About Marty Tousley
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As both a bereaved parent and a bereaved child herself, Marty Tousley, CNS-BC, FT has focused her practice on issues of grief, loss and transition for more than 40 years. She joined Hospice of the Valley in Phoenix, AZ as a Bereavement Counselor in 1996, and now serves as moderator for its online Grief Healing Discussion Groups. A frequent contributor to healthcare journals, newsletters, books and magazines, she is the author of Finding Your Way through Grief: A Guide for the First Year: Second Edition, The Final Farewell: Preparing for and Mourning the Loss of Your Pet, and Children and Pet Loss: A Guide for Helping. She has written a number of booklets for Hospice of the Valley including Explaining the Funeral /Memorial Service to Your Children and Helping Another in Grief, as well as monthly columns, e-books and online e-mail courses for Self-Healing Expressions, addressing various aspects of grief and loss. With her special interest in grief and the human-animal bond, Marty facilitated a pet loss support group for bereaved animal lovers in Phoenix for 15 years, and now serves as consultant to the Pet Loss Support Group at Hospice of the Valley and to the Halton-Peel Pet Loss Support Group in Ontario, Canada. Her work in pet loss and bereavement has been featured in the pages of Phoenix Magazine, The Arizona Republic, The East Valley Tribune, Arizona Veterinary News, Hospice Horizons, The Forum (ADEC Newsletter), The AAB Newsletter, Dog Fancy Magazine, Cat Fancy Magazine, Woof Magazine and Pet Life Magazine. On the Web since January, 2000, Marty’s Grief Healing site offers information, comfort and support to anyone who is anticipating or mourning the loss of a loved one, whether a person or a cherished companion animal. She is certified as a Fellow in Thanatology (Death, Dying and Bereavement) by the Association for Death Education and Counseling, and as a Clinical Specialist in Adult Psychiatric/Mental Health Nursing Practice by the American Nurses Association. Marty lives with her husband Michael and Beringer, their beloved Tibetan terrier, in Fountain Hills, Arizona. She welcomes reader questions and comments, and can be contacted at tousleym@aol.com or through her Web site, at www.griefhealing.com.
Marty Tousley's Articles
Using Antidepressant Medication in Grief
Question from a Reader: About four weeks ago, I came off an antidepressant which allowed the unresolved grief issues over my brother’s death to surface. I believe that the antidepressant kept me from fully grieving …
When the Griever is a Health-Care Professional
Question from a Reader: I don’t know where or how to start. I lost a beloved dog a month ago. My other dog is critically ill. I lost a very good friend earlier this year. …
Bereaved Aunt Asks, ‘Where Do I Fit In?’
Question from a reader: Two months ago, my 21-year-old nephew, my sister’s only child, was killed in a car accident. I was 19 when he was born. I have feelings of love for him almost …
The Power of Remembering: Grandfather’s Pipe
A person who is gone can live on in memory as an active agent in one’s life, not just as someone you love and miss, not just as a nostalgic sadness. – Elizabeth Harper Neeld, …
Animal Rescuer Devastated by Losses
Animal Rescuer Devastated As Shelter Disregards Her Wishes
© 2010 by Marty Tousley, CNS-BC, FT, DCC
Question from a reader: I have been saving sick, feral kittens for over five years. I expend an enormous amount of …
Persistent Dreams in Grief
Question from a reader: It’s now been six months since my mother died. In many ways it seems like worlds and eons since then, but in some ways not at all. I really miss her …
Daughter Wants to Help Mom after Death of Beloved Dog
Mother Agonizes Over Pet’s Burial
Question from a reader: I am writing in hopes that you may be able to provide advice or support that I can give my parents who just had to euthanize their 12-year-oldd …
Is Divorce Worthy of Grief?
Question from a reader: I recently tried to join a grief group. When the leader found out that my wife had not died, she told me that the others in the group would not feel …
Healing Grief through the Gift of Volunteering
You cannot do a kindness too soon, for you never know how soon it will be too late . . . the love of our neighbor in all its fullness simply means being able to …
When Grieving an Abandonment
Question from a reader: I was informed that my mother died, and I am grieving. My mother left me when I was a little girl. It hurt. I denied it for 40 years. So far, …
Can We Ever ‘Accept’ Death of Loved One?
Question from a reader: This just isn’t something I can live with. I want to see my dad more than anything in the world. I can’t even go near the words “closure” or “accept.” My …
Parental Grief in the Wake of Homicide
Question from a reader: I’m writing this letter in hopes of finding some peace. It will be three years next month that my son was murdered. He was only 18. His mother and I were …
‘Distance Counseling’: What is It, How Does it Work?
The electronic age is spawning a new way of delivering counseling services, one in which clients and their counselors connect with each other by telephone, e-mail or other electronic means. Recognizing this trend, many counselors …
Helping Grandchildren with Pet Loss
By – Marty Tousley, CNS-BC, FT
Question: I very sadly had to euthanize my wonderful dog of 8 years last night. She has been with me with so many other losses and helped me through. Now …
Coping as You Anticipate a Loss
By Marty Tousley, CNS-BC, FT, DCC
Grief does not wait for death to happen; it occurs both in anticipation of and following a loss. Extended illness, disability, severe accidental injury, a terminal diagnosis or the aging …
Can’t Think of Mom Without Crying
Question from a reader: I just wish for the day when I can think of my mom without crying. Why does it seem to last for so long?? It’s been five months since my mom …











