It is said that life is a journey. But, where do you go when the enormity of death suddenly stands in your way? How do you get through something so monumental? The loss of your child doesn’t just alter lives course, it obliterates the road. It destroys your expectations and leaves the future in ruin. It is extremely difficult to accept that you will never reach the places you thought you were going.

And, there is no going back to where you were. You feel so stranded and there is know one to turn to. It’s impossible to articulate just how lost you become.

If, on a mundane trip, you were suddenly confronted with a detour, you would hardly hesitate before maneuvering around it. Calamity in our lives can sometimes be avoided. Though, a collapse of this magnitude must be navigated through.

Let’s imagine for a moment that we are simply caught in traffic. We might wonder why our planned route is unexpectedly blocked. But it wouldn’t prevent us from finding another way. Perhaps the road was scheduled to be closed, and you were simply unaware. Maybe a storm toppled a grove of trees, or a rockslide created a barricade.

At this point, the cause is irrelevant. All that matters is that the time is now, and the road is closed. You might get disheartened and angry. You may even blame yourself, wondering what signs you might have missed along the way. But no amount of regret or reflection can change the place we find our selves today.

It’s clear to me now that it is the unanticipated events that cause the greatest damage. When your whole world is crumbling, there is no escape. So, I suppose the rockslide best represents the destruction we are facing. Our lives are in ruin and it weighs heavy on our minds.

We all understand that living is a dangerous venture, and that everything on earth will topple. But it seem that we never really comprehend this until it all comes crashing down.

Those rocks on the hilltop were always going to fall. Maybe even at a precise, predestined moment. They have been battered by the rain, pushed by the wind and jostled by the rumble of the highway. Even if we can not foresee or predict when it might happen, it an absolute certainty that one day it will.

With that in mind, maybe we should anticipate tragedies, unexpected closures and emotional breakdowns. It wouldn’t make it any easier to except, though it might reduce the lengths we go in asking ourselves why. Which, in turn might lead to a greater appreciation for the things that go as planed.

In the analogy of life being a journey, this is definitely a major turning point. And there is no avoiding the aftermath, as it completely blocks our path. But, we can get through it. Remember, it’s the impact of those we have lost that now lead us in this new direction. Yes, it’s taking us places we never wanted to go, and there’s no assurance that we won’t encounter other hazards along the way.  But it’s the only path we have on which to carry their memory forward.

As I struggle to regain some stability after my child’s death, it helps me to remember that we are all in the same position. Not just from a grief standpoint, but also from the perspective that we all teeter precariously atop the summit of life. Whether we are hopelessly lost or purposefully driven, our very nature equates us to the stones along the road. The loss of someone close to us frees us from the fear that we attached to death.

It’s almost reassuring to know that in time, we will fall too. Hope remains that our earthly collapse will form a bridge that finally leads us home.

Popularity: 3% [?]

Related posts

• How to Have a Good Bad Day – Dr. Darcie Sims (1)
• How the Phases of Grief Worked for Bereaved Mom (0)
• How Couples Grieve Differently After a Child-Loss (2)
• Helping your Child with Loss and Grief (1)
• Help Grieving Children Know They are Not Alone (2)