Forgive for Good: The Four Stages of Forgiveness

by Dr. Frederic Luskin, Ph.D.

The process of forgiveness can be a liberating experience, one that if practiced proactively can lead to a wonderful quality of life. Interestingly, forgiveness can only occur because we have been given the gift of choice. We have the choice to forgive or not to forgive, and no one can force us to do either. Conversely, if we want to forgive someone, no one can stop us. This ability to forgive is a manifestation of the personal control we have over our lives.

Compellingly, the option to forgive also implies that we had discretion as to whether or not we took offense in the first place. While forgiving may be a difficult enough choice for many of us, imagine how our lives would be if we rarely or never used our power of choice to take offense? Since we have choice, wouldn’t it make sense to limit the number of Read more