Dear “a grieving mother”,

I am sorry to hear of the death of your precious daughter. The devastating experience of the death of a child is a life long experience that we all respond to and deal with differently. You question if your husband?s chest pain, GI upset etc can be the result of delayed grief or PTSD. To answer that question one must always obtain a thorough diagnostic workup to determine what if any organic disease is causing the symptoms. Since this resulted in no pathology to explain his symptoms, then it is important to look at other possibilities. Stress has been proven to impact the body in numerous and unusual ways, and of course grief is one of the greatest stressors of all. Research has shown that stressful life events are associated with a range of medical symptoms that have no identified pathology. The only way to know for certain is to seek the consultation of a psychologist or other support mechanism to explore any possible grief related issues. It is possible that the current move etc. is compounding the grief and also creating other ambivalent feelings of which he is unaware. It is worth the effort to explore any and all avenues for finding relief from those troubling symptoms.

Dr. Coralease Cox Ruff

Coralease Ruff

Dr. Coralease Ruff is a Bereavement Facilitator, A Registered Nurse, a University Professor and an International Nursing Consultant. She and her husband became bereaved parents in 1997, following the death of their 21-year old daughter in an automobile accident in the Dominican Republic. Since then, she has been involved in the Compassionate Friends Inc. in many roles. Coralease is a frequent presenter on grief topics locally and nationally including The Compassionate Friends (TCF) National Conferences, the National Funeral Directors and Morticians Association and The Society of Childhood Emergencies as well as local universities, churches and community centers. She has held faculty positions at Catholic University, University of Washington, The Catholic University and is currently Professor Emeritus at Howard University. She is an end of life nursing educator and developed and currently teaches a university course on Grief and Loss to graduate and undergraduate nursing students. She has published widely in professional nursing literature and the lay press. Her grief articles include Grieving through the Years; When the Nurse is Grieving and Finding Help and Hope in the Aftermath of the Virginia Tech Tragedy. She combined a biography of her daughter with a grief handbook entitled; Her Light Still Shines which is published by iUniverse and will be available in bookstores soon. Dr. Coralease Ruff appeared on the radio show “Healing the Grieving Heart” with Dr. Gloria & Dr. Heidi Horsley to discuss, Grief and Your Health: Taking Care of Yourself. To hear this interview, click on the following link: www.voiceamericapd.com/health/010157/horsley072706.mp3 Dr. Coralease Ruff appeared on the radio show “Healing the Grieving Heart” with Dr. Gloria & Dr. Heidi Horsley to discuss, Coping with the Sudden Death of a Child in a Foreign Country. To hear this interview, go to the following link: https://www.voiceamerica.com/episode/39289/coping-with-sudden-death-of-a-child-in-a-foreign-country https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tte1iuiR6cQ

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