After my husband’s death, I looked for ways to continue our love.  I looked for ways to stay connected to him beyond the veil.  I wanted to understand death and dying.  I searched for ways for us to stay connected through our love, and for ways that we could still communicate.

I read about ADC’s, which stands for after death communication.  I prayed that Eddie would still let me know that he was with me, and that he still loved me; that was the only way that I was going to survive my walk alone.

I now believe that our loved ones are able to communicate with us if we remain open the possibilities.  I am one of the lucky ones.  I have received and continue to receive many after death communications from him.

I can remember the very first after death communication that I received from him; it remains vivid in my mind.  One sunny afternoon only a few weeks after my husband’s death, my daughter, my granddaughter, and I were standing in our driveway.  I was saying good-bye to them after one of their many visits with me.  It was always sad for me to say good-bye to them, and return to the empty house.  I would try and keep my composure until they were on their way; then I would put the garage door down and cry.

We were standing in the driveway saying our good-byes, and a butterfly was flitting around us.  My granddaughter was taken by the beauty of the butterfly.  We stood there talking and watching the butterfly fly by, then return to us.  I don’t know what made me do it but I put my hand out and told my granddaughter that the butterfly would land on my hand.  I told her that it was a sign from Grandpa.

I can only wonder what ever made me say that.  We all laughed; after all, Grandma never had a butterfly land on her hand on command before.  But, I felt for certain the butterfly would land as I spoke to it in my mind.

Lo and behold, the butterfly landed on my hand and stayed there for quite some time.  Then, it flew away only to return a short while later.  I again said that if I put my hand out that it would land on my hand again, and amazingly it did.  Again, it stayed on my hand for some time.

We were certain that it was a message from my husband; they often say that butterflies are a sign that our loved ones are around.  My granddaughter wanted the butterfly to land on her hand but instead it flew away and didn’t return.  This was the first after death communication that I received.

This after death communication happen in many ways.  Most importantly, you have to believe in them.  So many people refuse to believe that our loved ones are communicating with us from beyond the veil.  They explain away these communications as mere coincidences or as imaginations run wild.  However, in my heart I know that they are real.

For instance, another common way of communicating is by feathers.  That first year after my husband’s death, as I walked into work, I would find a feather.  I have a box full of feathers.  I even found a feather under my desk at home and there is no logical explanation as to how it got there.  I still work at the same place and I have yet to find a feather as I enter the building.

I keep an immaculate house.  One day, I walked into the bedroom only to find a small paper heart on the carpet.  It wasn’t there before, and I can’t explain how it got there.  But, it made my heart sing because I knew that it was a message from Eddie telling me that he loved me.

These are just two examples of how he has communicated with me.  There have been flashing lights, radio station interruptions, burners on the stove that I can’t turn off (the electronic ignition just kept trying to ignite – Eddie used to love to cook). There was the Grandmother clock that we bought when we were first married, stopping only to start again and then keeping perfect time (it had been running slow.)

I have learned that these are happenings that I can’t share openly with everyone.  I think it is because unless you have lost your spouse, unless you have lost the love of your life, unless you have lost your soul mate, there is no way that you can understand.

No one wants to talk about death.  No one wants to talk about the possibility of after death communications except for those who so desperately want to hear from their loved one.  So, these are things that I hold close to my heart; happenings that allow me to continue my walk alone without the love of my life.

Paula Ezop 2011

Read Paula Ezop’s book A Widow’s Journey: Healing a Broken Heart – Kindle edition by Ezop, Paula M. Religion & Spirituality Kindle eBooks @ Amazon.com.

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