My birthday was yesterday and I love my birthday.  I think it is the one day of the year where you should be able to celebrate the way you want to and call your own shots all day with no questions or suggestions from anybody.  It is a day to celebrate life, to be thankful that you have again arrived in a place where you get to start a whole new adventure in your life.

My birthday, like almost all of my birthdays past, was absolutely wonderful.  I started off with breakfast being made for me by my mom and then we had our second annual golf outing with my uncle, siblings and cousins, followed by a barbeque.  It seemed like all of my favorite foods were at this barbeque thanks to my mom and aunt.  Cheeseburgers (a personal favorite), tuna macaroni salad, pesto chicken, Dorito taco salad, and of course Funfetti cupcakes (another personal favorite) and apple pie (my all time favorite dessert).  The phone calls, text messages, cards and gifts all equaled such a special day.  I couldn’t ask for a better day.  Or could I?  It was also the 4th birthday that my Dad wasn’t there to celebrate with me.

My Dad never really did much to celebrate my birthday.  He thought I always went overboard on my birthday and I thought he never cared enough about his own birthday when he had his special day.  He would usually just give me a head nod and say, “Happy Birthday.”  For some strange reason since I haven’t got that head nod in 4 years it seems like something very little is still missing from my life.  It’s hard not to reflect and think on any special day of the year what it would be like if things had not changed so drastically on one given day.  Things change and it is just a little different than when you celebrated before.  Not worse, just different.

Take time to reflect on special holidays such as birthdays about all the positive memories from your Dad or loved one.  It will be a trip down memory lane that is well worth taking.  Realize that alhough these people are not here physically to celebrate with you, they are always in your heart and mind guiding you through your days.

For me, I appreciated the small details of life like getting to enjoy another funfetti cupcake for a year, and it tasted really good. So it wasn’t just another birthday, it was the birthday that just keeps getting better every year.

Question for the day: Who’s birthday will you help celebrate that might need some help in the celebration department?

Always a friend to listen,

Eric Tomei-author I Miss My Dad

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