Open to Hope Articles

Do you want to read stories of others who have been where you are? Are you looking for bereavement help, and advice? Look no further. We offer over 7,000 articles written by our Open to Hope authors.

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Dad Dying of Dementia

Posted on May 5, 2025 - by Rachael Martinez

Dad Dying of Dementia When I was a little girl, I idolized my dad. The ease in which he moved through life, his gentle nature and compassionate soul made being with him feel like being tightly embraced, pulled into a warm hug that could cure the worst kind of day. I remember being in awe of him and his light, his steady hand, the way he made anyone he spoke to feel important. From the joyful and lighthearted years of childhood to the trying, sticky years of adolescence, my dad was a place of solace for me, carrying my burdens […]

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Losing Your Lover to an Overdose

Posted on May 5, 2025 - by Betty Espindola

Losing Your Lover to an Overdose I met Trinidad during my third year of recovery.  Attending a 12-step meeting, feeling I was going to be alone forever, clean and alone, his smile caught my eye from across the room. I loved his smile!  We began talking and things moved quickly.  I knew he was the one. Neither of us had been married or had children, and we both had three years of recovery.  We moved in together, and were married in a little chapel in Yosemite, two years later. Our life was truly magical, homey, down to earth, old fashion, […]

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Caring for Surviving Siblings

Posted on May 2, 2025 - by Judy Lipson

Caring for Surviving Siblings  A decade ago, I was fortunate to meet Heidi Horsley, a fellow surviving sibling and philanthropist. We bonded immediately. After years of being alone in my grief, I was grateful to connect with individuals who understand, are compassionate, speak the same language, and are members of the same club. Thanks to Heidi, who is executive director of Open to Hope, this year marks a decade of me contributing articles for this website. Writing became a vital tool in my grief journey. The process began with journaling, progressed to articles, and ultimately a memoir. I never dreamed […]

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Setting the Intention to Live Again

Posted on April 28, 2025 - by Dolores Cruz

Setting the Intention to Live Again That cruel knock on the door was not my first introduction to grief, but it was, by far, the most brutal. My kind, compassionate, and very handsome 24-year-old son, my youngest of four wonderful children, had not come home that night. My mother’s heart was extremely worried. But that loud knock shook me to my core, and something deep inside of me knew what it was. It was 5:30 AM. My daughter, Vanessa, who followed me downstairs to the door, was the only one home as my husband was out of town on business. […]

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How Many Siblings Do You Have?

Posted on April 28, 2025 - by Judy Lipson

How Many Siblings Do You Have? “How many siblings do you have?” It is a dreaded question asked of many a surviving sibling. When I’m asked, my heart thumps out of my chest. I sense the heat rising on my face and struggle to breathe. How do I answer? For me, the answer has changed over time. When asked, decades after I lost my sisters, I still experience the tremor in my body. Regardless of how ready I believe myself to be, the experience leaves me reeling when asked. After my younger sister Jane died in 1981, was I now […]

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Death, Advanced Directives, and Dad Jokes

Posted on April 28, 2025 - by Symon Braun Freck

Death, Advanced Directives, and Dad Jokes It was the best conversation we never wanted to have. I filled out an Advanced Directive with my dad. And it was fun! I had asked family members to fill out Advanced Directives a few times before. I know feelings about your mortality change and, thus, your view of care shifts. And they needed an update. I decided to complete an Advanced Directive, the Five Wishes Document, for myself before asking my dad to complete his. I am not sure that was the right decision. Often, my dad would ask me what I chose […]

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Finding Joy While Grieving: Carrying the Tiger

Posted on April 28, 2025 - by Tony Stewart

Finding Joy While Grieving Recently, a grief counselor told me something disturbing. He had been describing my new memoir, Carrying the Tiger: Living with Cancer, Dying with Grace, Finding Joy while Grieving, to one of his support groups. When he reached the point where I began to form a new relationship just a few months after the death of my beloved wife, several of the women stopped listening. “Women grieve, men replace,” one said dismissively, and the others nodded in agreement. They assumed that my actions suggested emotional abandonment, or perhaps a kind of infidelity, both of which they found […]

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New Love and Memories After the Death of My Wife

Posted on April 21, 2025 - by Tony Stewart

New Love After the Death of My Wife Monday, September 27, 2021 We consolidated Lynn’s clothes into a closet and a bureau, unearthed her beautiful scarves and handbags, and put them in a couple of baskets in the living room. We went through her family photos, collected her sketchbooks into one pile, and flipped through years of drawings. The whole process was immensely sad. Every day brought dozens of touchstones of our shared life: photos that I examined, perfumes that I sniffed, and handwritten notes that I read until I couldn’t bear to read further. I was sad from morning […]

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Picking Up the Pieces after the Death of My Wife

Posted on April 21, 2025 - by Tony Stewart

Picking Up the Pieces First comes denial. I tell myself that because Lynn and I got to say all those goodbyes, because she knew how much I loved her, because we had no regrets about our choices, my grief should be shallower or shorter than most. In post after post, I emphasize the positives—as when, just two days after she died, I describe riding around Central Park looking forward to my life ahead. But really, I am in shock, as when your body and mind conspire to shield you from the pain of an accident. For more than six years, […]

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Watching My Wife Die: Carrying the Tiger

Posted on April 21, 2025 - by Tony Stewart

Watching My Wife Die “Sometimes you have to say enough is enough.” It is late afternoon. Lynn and I are in the living room, she in her wheelchair, me in a folding chair in front of her. There is one light on, leaving most of the room in shadow. Dr. Hellman speaks calmly, gently. “If you go back to the hospital now, you will probably never come out,” he says. “The radiation may slow it a little, but there’s just too much cancer. We’re not going to beat it, and the treatments will make you even weaker. If there’s ever […]

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