Coping with the death of my twin has been an incredibly challenging and personal experience. Finding meaning and purpose in the aftermath has and continues to be a deeply personal journey. My writing helps. I offer these suggestions for individuals as they navigate their own loss. Give yourself space to heal It is important to give yourself permission to grieve […]
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Son’s Grief Opens a Door I got a belated birthday card from my mother for my 41st birthday. “To Our Wonderful Daughter,” was scripted on the front, in gold, above a bouquet of pastel flowers. Inside, on the right page, in the same Hallmark font: “Another year of the one-and-only you.” On the left, was my mother’s black-scripted message: “Anne, […]
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Finding Meaning in Violent Loss When I hear about “finding meaning” in grief, I feel a knee-jerk reaction to snap back with a salty, “What possible meaning can come from the violent death of a beautiful, sweet, healthy ten-year-old girl?” What I want to assure you of is this: I am in no way suggesting that the death of your […]
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Toxic Positivity in Grief When I first started devouring information about the grieving process after Libby died, I remember immediately being turned off by the overly negative messaging on social media and in some books about grief. People who were YEARS and YEARS out from losing their loved ones were still crying daily, unable to function. In one particular Facebook […]
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Are You Sabotaging Your Grief Journey? This article is going to require you to be a little bit brutal with yourself. The goal of the telling the truth principle is to create a baseline so that you know where you are starting and can decide how to move forward with your grief. Of course, you want to feel better. However, […]
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Grief Guilt is about Loss of Control Guilt is, in my humble opinion, one of the most prevalent emotions during grief, and one that many grievers seem to come back to again and again. Feelings of guilt stem from an overwhelming desire to be in control of something that’s uncontrollable. Your mind isn’t yet ready to accept that your loss […]
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Creating a Loss History The first place we need to start is the past. We’re going way back—as far back as you can remember—and dredging up any experiences that may have helped shape your awareness of grief. “But Brooke, whyyyyyyyyy would you want me to dig up all of the depressing things in my life when I’m already feeling depressed?” […]
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People Will Say Stupid Stuff When it comes to insensitive comments, you will be on the receiving end of a ton of them. Yes, people will say stupid stuff. It’s important to keep in mind that it’s usually not the offending person’s fault—grief is an awkward topic for most people, and they struggle for the right words of comfort. Most […]
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Practicing Gratitude in Grief OK, OK. Before you throw lasagna in my face, let me just assure you that this section is not going to be full of toxic positivity and the rah-rah crap that makes grieving people want to vomit. What I am going to do is share how I, personally, have employed gratitude practices throughout my grief journey […]
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Create Meaning Through Ritual Creating traditions, rituals, and ceremonies that celebrate your person is the shit. Seriously. It’s the opposite of the get-over-it and move-on mentality. Instead, by celebrating the existence of the person we lost and including details of their personality and passions in traditions that honor their legacy, we create meaning that makes us feel whole again. I […]
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Open to Hope is an online community offering inspirational stories of loss, hope and recovery. We believe hope is the bridge between loss and recovery.
