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Zaneta Gileno: TAPS Helps After Military Deaths

Posted on October 6, 2018 - by Jessica Tyner Mehta

Zaneta Gileno works for the Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors (TAPS), a non-profit that supports people who lost loved ones in the military. As the Director of Community-Based care, Gileno helps connect people to individualized grief counseling. She spoke with Dr. Heidi Horsley during the 2015 Association for Death Education and Counseling conference about her work and personal experience with TAPS. Peer support is what Gileno believes most helps children who lose a parent in the military, as Gileno lost her own father at a young age. Dr. Horsley also utilizes the services of TAPS, and knows first-hand just how […]

Carole Hilton: TAPS for Widows

Posted on October 3, 2018 - by Heidi Horsley

The Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors (TAPS) was a buoy for Carole Hilton, who discovered the program just a few days after her husband died. He was an active member in the Navy, and when the officer arrived at Hilton’s doorstep to deliver the news, within the paperwork was a TAPS brochure. Hilton talked with the Open to Hope Executive Director, Dr. Heidi Horsley, during the 2015 Association for Death Education and Counseling conference about what TAPS means to her. Nobody plans on becoming a young widow or ever having that title bestowed upon them. However, Hilton says that simply […]

Saying Goodbye to Dad

Posted on September 30, 2018 - by Thomas Attig

I remember my last visit before Dad died in 1969. Mom called me at graduate school to tell me that he was quite ill (he’d suffered a stroke four years earlier) and had been admitted to the hospital again. She made it clear that if I came, it would be my last visit. Though incredibly weak, Dad, as usual, was glad to see me. Our conversation was minimal. Quiet time predominated. He seemed surprised at my visit, since I had visited him at home not long before. Yet, he acted not so surprised. It was as if he knew why […]

Antonio Sausys: Yoga and Grief (in Spanish)

Posted on September 28, 2018 - by John Rampton

John Rampton, de Open to Hope, dialoga con Antonio Sausys acerca de la ayuda que brinda el yoga a las personas en duelo, siendo el yoga una disciplina integral que trata mente, cuerpo y espíritu. Yoga logra ayudar a mejorar los síntomas presentados durante el duelo. Estos síntomas pueden incluir la disfunción del ciclo del sueño, problemas estomacales, endocrinológicos, entre otros. Existe confusión ante el duelo y Sausys lo explica muy bien cuando dice, ¨el duelo nos pone frente a nuestra propia mortalidad y nos enfrenta al hecho de que todas las cosas que existen en el universo inevitablemente van […]

Patricia Therese: Catholic Cemeteries and Crematoria

Posted on September 26, 2018 - by Gloria Horsley

As the first Bereavement Consultant for the Catholic Cemeteries and Crematoria, established under the archdiocese of the Catholic Church in Australia, Therese attended the 2015 Association of Death Education and Counseling where she spoke with Dr. Gloria Horsley about her work and this new position in the church. Therese’s experience with bereaved families stretches back decades, starting when she was just 18 and worked in a hospice. “I was immersed in how to really care for the dying and bereaved there,” she says. Under the tutelage of nuns, she was taught that no one should die alone and has carried […]

Steve Roberts: Finding Forgiveness and Community After the Death of a Child

Posted on September 23, 2018 - by Jessica Tyner Mehta

Steve Roberts and Open to Hope’s Executive Director, Dr. Heidi Horsley, became friend in 2006 when they met at The Compassionate Friends. Professionally, Roberts is a bank consultant, but his experience with grief dates back to 2005 when he lost his daughter. “Kelsey was 11 years old, she was killed at her home by her mother, and so my life completely changed as of August 5, 2005.” Roberts started attending The Compassionate Friends support groups in Dallas, and then became involved as a steering committee member. The upcoming July 2015 The Compassionate Friends national conference will be held in […]

Don’t the Dead Take their Time Leaving?

Posted on September 23, 2018 - by Heidi Gessner

After my father died, I became fascinated about where he went. Someone came to take his body out of our house and to a funeral home. He was cremated and his remains were put into an urn. But he was gone. Gone where? Where was the essence of him? I remember my siblings, mother and I all gathered around his hospital bed in our den. His yellow face dropped to the side as he took one last sucking inhalation. We waited for another one, but it didn’t come. His mouth was still partly open. One thing I knew—he was no […]

Why Do Therapists Warn the Bereaved that they Will Divorce?

Posted on September 22, 2018 - by Gloria Horsley

Dr. Gloria Horsley responds: You got me. I have been a therapist for many years and have repeatedly been told that, parents who lose children divorce. Let’s see, Phil and I have been married for over forty years and it has been over twenty since our son was killed. Memories of our dear Scott seem to bring us closer rather than driving us apart. That is not to say we didn’t have our down times. I remember on Scott’s eighteenth birthday, I had a pizza party for all of his friends.? I had about twenty kids in the house and […]

Hospice and Healing: Interview with Anne Baker

Posted on September 18, 2018 - by Gloria Horsley

At the annual ADEC (Association of Death Education and Counseling), I spoke with Anne Baker about healing and helping through hospice. Anne’s losses started early, when she was just 7 years old her mother died suddenly. Just three years later, Anne’s little sister died. At that point in Anne’s life, there was no outlet for her to share her loss with others who have gone through the same thing. After two significant losses in her life, Anne went on to become a volunteer for Hospice Caring, which is a non-medical, volunteer-based hospice in Montgomery, Maryland. Anne is now one of […]

Last Words With

Posted on September 16, 2018 - by Yvonne Lancaster

Coming home was a tough time of day. It signaled the end of the occupational work day, and the beginning of the personal work evening…preparing dinner, doing laundry, taxiing kids, whatever else kept me going until 11 p.m. My 5 p.m. homecoming blues had often been softened by seeing my oldest son Brian’s familiar dark blue Chevy Citation sitting in the driveway. His bumper stickers read: “Free the Beaches” and “Save the Whales.” My heart was always warmed to know I’d raised a son who was a caring person. As I deftly balanced grocery bags, a trick I’ve learned over the […]