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To The Widow Struggling With Guilt

Posted on September 3, 2018 - by Kerry Phillips

On the outside, the world sees you hurting from the loss of your spouse. They don’t know; however, that in addition to the “normal” feelings of grief, you’re also struggling with guilt. You blame yourself for not insisting that he see the doctor when his cough got progressively worse. You beat yourself up for not seeing beyond his reassurances that he was “okay”. Perhaps you had a fight before he stormed out of the house and you wished you’d chased after him. Or, if you’re like me, you carry the burden of not getting on an earlier flight. Regardless of the circumstances, […]

Dear Dad: Letters to a Man I Never Knew

Posted on August 26, 2018 - by Gary Jaworski

Introduction Dear Dad is the story of my life told in the form of letters to my father, Walter Michael Jaworski, who died of a heart attack when I was five and whom, therefore, I never got to know. It is not a maudlin story of regret, but the tale of how one’s entire life — conscious and unconscious — can be shaped by the defining moment of a parent’s death, and how my own fatherhood lifted me from a lifetime of pain. Letters 2-4 Dear Dad, I don’t know who you are, and so, I don’t know who I am. They tell […]

Dear Dad: A Letter to the Long Deceased

Posted on August 24, 2018 - by Gary Jaworski

Introduction Dear Dad is the story of my life told in the form of letters to my father, Walter Michael Jaworski, who died of a heart attack when I was five and whom, therefore, I never got to know. It is not a maudlin story of regret, but the tale of how one’s entire life — conscious and unconscious — can be shaped by the defining moment of a parent’s death, and how my own fatherhood lifted me from a lifetime of pain. The idea of a letter to my father was suggested by a kindly psychotherapist who, during my mental breakdown […]

You Know You’re Recovering from Grief When . . .

Posted on August 21, 2018 - by Harriet Hodgson

Grief is a dark place, so dark you wonder if you will ever see light again. While you’re grieving, you are struggling to find your way through a long tunnel of darkness and there is no light ahead. You wonder if you will survive. Maybe you won’t find your way out of the tunnel, a terrible thought, and one that adds to your sorrow. Courageous as you have been in the past, you wonder if you have the courage to face this new challenge. It a life without a loved one worth living? Although you’re trying as hard as you can, you […]

You Can’t Unfriend the Dead

Posted on August 14, 2018 - by Greg Adams

Not too long ago, I attended a presentation on grieving in a social-media world. Like so many things with social media, there is good news and bad news. The good news is that social media provides new and creative ways for grieving people to connect and to memorialize. These connections can reduce feelings of isolation and provide affirmation and helpful information in powerful ways. The bad news is that, especially for young people, news of a death can travel so fast—sometimes faster than good, accurate information—and this also lends to learning about a death without a real person present […]

Grieving in Advance

Posted on August 12, 2018 - by Mary Joye

Is it possible to fully grieve in advance? Only you can truly answer that. This preceding part of the grieving process has been clinically labeled as “Anticipatory Grief”. Perhaps it isn’t as simple as it sounds. How do you anticipate what will happen to you? Some may think that if their loved one is ill a long time they have even more time “prepare”. It may be that you expect and accept the loss of a loved one. That is a form of preparation. It’s good to say goodbyes or do things that help all involved to come to grips […]

Spirituality After a Loss: Interview with Reverend Michael Jemmott

Posted on August 10, 2018 - by Gloria Horsley

At the annual ADEC (Association of Death Education and Counseling), I spoke with Reverend Michael Jemmott about faith and spirituality after loss. Reverend Michael works with bereaved people in Baltimore and runs an organization called Roberta’s House, which is a family grief support center. When it comes to dealing with grief, where is God in all of this? Reverend Michael gives his take in the video below. Here are some key takeaways from the video: One of the things Reverend Michael found out over time is that God is always present, but usually ignored. The only way that you can […]

Litea Williams and Eleanor Haley: What’s Your Grief?

Posted on August 8, 2018 - by Heidi Horsley

What’s Your Grief? is an organization founded and operated by Litea Williams and Eleanor Haley. “Practical, down to earth tools” is their specialty. They also do a lot of work in Baltimore City, working with the community and in particular with the homeless population. Williams and Haley spoke with Open to Hope’s Executive Director Dr. Heidi Horsley during the Association for Death Education and Counseling 2015 conference about their work and experience with grief therapy. “We’ll be presenting here a little bit about grief below the poverty line,” explains Williams. When a person is homeless and also grieving, it introduces […]

How I Transformed Grief into Growth

Posted on July 17, 2018 - by Ruth Field

On a balmy summer evening in 2011, my beloved 26-year-old son David was killed instantly in a motorcycle accident and my life was forever changed. Suddenly plunged into a crazy altered reality, I wandered helplessly through disbelief, confusion, anguish, and searing pain. For a long time I felt stuck in my misery, since death is so permanent and so unarguably final. I couldn’t stop thinking about what his last moments were like for him and what his life could have been (and should have been). But as the days and weeks rolled by, I became increasingly aware of a question […]

When Others Want to Know Why You Aren’t ‘Over’ the Death of Your Child

Posted on July 17, 2018 - by Laura Diehl

Lately, the question I have been getting the most is, “How do I get the people around me to understand why I am still grieving the death of my child so deeply?” We already feel like we are going crazy, and having family and friends tell us we “should be past this by now” may have us locked in a world of deep anger, or wondering if maybe we are losing it and need to see someone for help or to be locked up. Here are some things you may not be aware of. As a parent who has faced […]