Deb Kosmer

Deb has worked at Affinity Visiting Nurses Hospice for ten years, the first two as a hospice social worker and the last eight as Bereavement Support Coordinator supporting families before and after the death of their loved ones. She provides supportive counseling, developed and facilitates a variety of grief support groups, including a well-attended group for men only as well as other educational events. Deb received her Bachelor’s degree in Social Work from UW-Oshkosh and her Master’s degree in Social Work from UW Milwaukee. She received her certification in Thanatology through ADEC. Her writing has appeared in New Leaf Magazine, We Need Not Walk Alone, Living with Loss, Grief Digest, numerous hospice publications and EAP publications. Some of her poetry on death and dying will be included in a college textbook for social workers in end of life soon. New Leaf has also used some of her poetry for a line of sympathy and anniversary of death cards. On a personal level, Deb's 14-year-old son died after being struck by a car. Her 31-year-old sister had died in a car accident eight months earlier, and her 56-year-old father died from a heart attack exactly three years before. These three unexpected deaths within three years started Deb on a journey she never wanted to be on and she learned first-hand the importance of having the help and support of others. In the years since, she has experienced other losses, the most recent being the unexpected death of her 44-year-old step-daughter who died from complications three months after routine surgery. Deb's passions are writing, reading, education, nature, and family. She is currently working on a book of her grief poetry. She recently moved with her husband to Waypost Camp, Hatley WI. Her husband accepted a job there as Property Manager and his position allows them to live on-site with acres of woods and a lake. She anticipates the quiet beauty to be a strong catalyst for writing.

Articles:

Twelve Things to Remember about the Holidays and Grief

1. That I could not predict how I would feel or react at any given moment.  2. That as much as I missed my loved ones I would miss them […]

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Time Stops After a Loved One Dies

When someone we love dies time stops. It does not take long for us to realize that it is for us only that time has stopped. We stand caught in […]

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Anger is Natural Emotion in Grief

Lately I am angry More often than not Not out in the open In your face angry But silent subtle Under currents Of unnamed rage Assaulting me for Being held […]

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Grief is Feeling Alone in Your Own Skin

Grief is one of the loneliest places in the world. When my son died, I felt every connection I had ever had was gone. I felt invisible even to myself. […]

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When Our Closest Loved One Has Died

She laughed at my jokes. She never forgot my birthday. Once a week, she made liver for me, even though she hated it. She made it anyway for me. She […]

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Poem: Mother’s Day

Our last Mother’s Day together you bought me a hammock. I remember your excitement as I opened it and my anticipation as you gleefully put it together. We all tried […]

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Grief Support Group Helps after Child-Loss

Without you, my world seems too big. I don’t know how to fill the space that was you. I only know sometimes I get lost in it. The space left […]

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Shoes Bring Memories Years After Child’s Death

Sometimes no matter how far we have come, a moment occurs when we are blindsided again or subtly reminded that grief does not end. A moment that no matter how […]

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How Grief and Winter’s End are Similar

Have you ever noticed that it’s hard to tell when winter really ends and spring begins? Just when it seems all the snow has melted and that there hasn’t been […]

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The Feelings of Grief

RAGE: This is an emotion we may feel when grieving but be reluctant to admit. When someone we love dies, we feel the raw wound of their absence. The raw emotions that […]

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