Dr. Heidi Horsley of the Open to Hope Foundation interviews Jennifer Collins Taylor on behalf of the Association for Death Education and Counseling (ADEC) organization. Taylor is the founder of Living Life, Dying Death, an author, and a speaker specializing in how to have meaningful and healthy conversations about death, dying, and grieving. She lost her brother 31 years ago, and that was the catalyst for pursuing a career in death and dying. “Who am I now that he’s not…
Dr. Heidi Horsley interviews Dr. Betty Davies, a professor and senior scholar at the University of Victoria’s School of Nursing. Also a professor emeritus at the University of California, San Francisco, Dr. Davies wrote Shadows in the Sun: The Experiences of Sibling Bereavement in Childhood for her students, those who have lost a sibling themselves, or anyone in the bereavement field. A leader in the field of sibling bereavement, Dr. Davies says she thinks of this type of bereavement as…
"I'm sorry, but there was nothing we could do...she's gone," the doctor stated in a professional tone of voice on that life-changing Thanksgiving morning. I felt as though my stomach and heart had been knocked out of me, then after the initial shock, as though I couldn't breathe at all. It felt as though grief and life had knocked my breath out of me and took all of my oxygen away. I was only 19 when my 22 year-old sister,…
It was a baby rat. Recently, after years of contemplating the possibility, I obtained two adult rats as pets. They were potentially to be used as live examples in the psychology classes I taught, and in a fun way—treats all around! A day after I received the rats, the previous owner informed me that one of the 5-month-old females “might” be pregnant. Two weeks later, that possibility became a reality. Ten baby rats emerged, and all were seemingly healthy and…
Drs. Gloria and Heidi Horsley talk with Erika Barber about her experience with losing a sibling. Barber enjoyed life with her sister for 15 years, but after her sister committed suicide, Barber found herself lost. It’s been a lifelong exploration to define who she is without her sister’s physical presence. She wrote Letters from a Friend: A Sibling’s Guide for Coping and Grief to help others in similar situations, but also to help herself work through the unique challenges of…
Episode 24 of The Open to Hope show features Drs. Gloria and Heidi Horsley interviewing Dana Brophy and Zander Sprague. Brophy is the daughter of Alan Pedersen, the Executive Director of The Compassionate Friends. She lost her brother, Sean, and knows all too well how disenfranchised sibling loss can be. Like many siblings, she hid her feelings in order to protect her parents. So much of the time, the focus is on the parents when a child dies, but a…
Dana Brophy is the daughter of Alan Pedersen, Executive Director of The Compassionate Friends. Her personal experience with sibling loss has unfortunately made Brophy an expert on sibling loss. Her brother, Sean, died when he was 21 in a car accident. He was her only sibling and, even though she wasn’t a young child when he died, she found herself in the unique situation of suddenly having very protective parents. Her family is involved with Angels Across the USA, and…
When Dr. Heidi Horsley was in college, she lost her 17-year-old brother Scott in a car accident. “The loss was so severe for me and the pain was so great, I honestly didn’t know how I was going to survive or if I even wanted to.” She remembers the early years, and how many people told her she needed to be strong for her parents. Not only was that advice unhelpful, but it was also hurtful. Today, as an industry…
Dr. Brenda Marshall talks about adult sibling loss with Dr. Heidi Horsley at the 2015 Association for Death Education and Counseling conference. Dr. Marshall entered the field when her younger brother, Brent, died suddenly eight years ago. She found little support for adult siblings, which led her on a path to figuring out why this was and what she could do about it. “A lot of people take their sibling for granted and assume they’re always going to be there,”…
Stephen Stott, a Columbia University graduate and one of Dr. Heidi Horsley’s former students, is in the field of sibling loss after losing his own sister in 2002. Stott’s mother started attending The Compassionate Friends meetings immediately, but it took Stott over a decade to join. His mother asked if he felt comfortable going, and for the first time since his sister died, he said yes. “I think the experience was great, but I was nervous,” he says. He didn’t…