I wrote this poem over and over in my head for almost two years. I did not write it down on paper until this past August. I was with my mother, holding her hand, staring into her eyes and telling her that I loved her and will never stop loving her and will never forget her. Mom was minutes away from dying, and although I tried preparing myself for her death by reading everything I possibly could about the process of dying, it did not soften the blow.

Death’s Reality

Decrease in blood pressure…
Who will stop the pain
As it continues to rain?
Our Lord.

Irregular breathing stop/start…
Who will stop the burning tears
As it continues the fears?
Our Lord.

Eyes glassy tearing, half open…
Who will stop the sadness
As it continues like madness?
Our Lord.

Pulse weak, hard to find…
Who will stop the anger
As it continues only to danger?
Our Lord.

Cannot be awakened…
Who will stop the grief
As it continues to destroy our belief.
Our Lord.

“Bless those who know not what another day will bring.”

Deborah Ann Tornillo
Copyright © 2009
http://www.authorsden.com/dtornillo

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Deborah Tornillo

Deborah Tornillo was born and raised in Corpus Christi, Texas by her loving and nurturing parents. She attended the University of San Miguel de Allende, Mexico, where she studied Art. After marrying, raising two daughters and enjoying life with her family, Deborah joined a higher calling by committing to be the primary caregiver for her parents, both of whom were diagnosed with Alzheimer’s in February 2006. In her new collection of memoirs, 36 Days Apart: A memoir of a daughter, her parents and the Beast named – Alzheimer’s: A story of Life, Love and Death, Deborah chronicles the time spent taking care of her mother and father. 36 Days Apart recounts this painful, enlightening journey, and Tornillo writes candidly about the struggles and fears she faced as her parents’ caregiver. As their disease progressed, Tornillo was faced with the difficult task of learning how to be a parent to her own parents. Through the year and a half of caring for them she extensively researched Alzheimer’s in order to provide the best care possible, all the while knowing that the disease would eventually win in the end. 36 Days Apart gives an honest, unflinching look at the realities of caring for and losing loved ones to Alzheimer’s. Tornillo gives the reader an inside look into the day-to-day life she faced during her heartbreaking, difficult time.

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