Ok, so obviously this isn’t a real holiday, but it is to me. This made up holiday, is the day before my toughest day of the year, Father’s Day. It is the one day of the year where I feel really different from everybody else, and only a few people in my life can truly understand what I am really going through. They say, through time that the loss gets easier which is true to a point. You never forget it though. A little part of you wants to celebrate what everybody else does, but can’t.
I asked a lot of people this week what they were doing this week to celebrate Father’s Day and none of them had an excited look on their faces, even the fathers. “Well we might do a barbeque” “I probably will get a tie.” “My kids don’t call me on Father’s Day.” Nobody seemed really excited about it, which kind of disturbed me. I felt like saying, “You are really going to be eating your words someday, when this is a hard day for you.” But just like everything else in life, you can’t make people “get it”. They couldn’t possibly understand how important this day is because, every year they know they HAVE to celebrate it with Dad, not WANTING to celebrate it like they should.
Dad’s everywhere need to be thankful and enthusiastic about family traditions and fun things their family does for them on this day. Appreciate and warmly except any gratitude shown by your family on a job well done for another year. Most Dad’s could care less about gifts given to them on this day, it is all about the family being together and spending that special time together that you talk about 20 years from now. It’s important that everybody spend quality time with their Dad or Dad-like figure in their life, because the one thing you can’t get back in life is time. Make tomorrow with your Dad quality time instead of quantity time.
I leave you with a simple question: If you could say one thing to your Dad if he was here right now, what would you say to him? I anxiously look forward to your comments. Make tomorrow and every day special.
Always a friend to listen,
Eric Tomei-author I Miss My Dad
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Tags: grief, hope