Grief is Love, Joy is Love
What words come to mind when we think of love? I think of emotion, devotion, adoration, and respect. Each person may have their own unique definition of love. I want to speak about love in grief and love in joy, two powerful feelings, and how I came to realize love is the connection to both.
For years, the dichotomy in my brain never allowed me to witness the symmetry of grief and joy, and find a place in my heart for both.
Grief is Deep
Losing my cherished sisters Margie and Jane forever changed me. I felt a hole in my heart. Because of the intense love I felt for Margie and Jane, the feeling of grief is deep.
When I held my three precious grandchildren for the first time, I didn’t want to allow myself the freedom to experience joy. How can I allow myself to feel joy? The love and intense joy I experienced the instant I saw each grandchild, changed my feelings.
With the birth of Benji, Jake, and Madelyn, born in the past four years, I looked into their bright eyes, my heart bubbled over with happiness; a new life, a new beginning, and a new legacy. Their eyes met mine, I melted, and their births forever changed me. My heart hurt missing Margie and Jane, wanting them beside me. Love is the common denominator. I may have joy and grief surrounded by love.
Grief and Joy Merge in Love
The cycle connected by hearts meaning love, and to my beloved sister Margie. Margie adored hearts. Every piece of her connected to hearts in how she signed a card, in mementos she chose from travel, her many pieces of heart jewelry, and most importantly her warm, generous heart.
Cherished memories of my sisters and I buying the packaged Valentine’s in the red box with a see-through heart displaying tiny cards to distribute to our classmates along with the sugary sweetheart candies. We brought our valentines home in a brown bag and excitedly opened them together at the kitchen table. Margie liked the red-hot heart candies, Jane the sweethearts, I liked both. Chocolates and flowers were the norm, and today the stores chocked full of heart merchandise from clothing, mugs, and candles.
I recently attended a concert of the music of Burt Bacharach. I was struck by one of his songs, “What the World Needs Now Is Love.” Love is the center of many emotions, a commonality, and how we merge our grief and joy, allowing our hearts space for both.
I hope that wherever you are, whatever your circumstances, you have a piece of love in your heart for someone or something special to you.
Read more from Judy Lipson on Open to Hope: https://www.opentohope.com/selecting-songs-…honor-loved-ones/
Purchase Judy Lipson’s book at https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1608082679/ref=dbs_a_def_rwt_bibl_vppi_i0
