Experiencing sadness or grief can come from feeling that something is missing, something has been lost. When you think about someone now gone who inspired you, made a difference in your life – or, like Robin Williams, someone who made you laugh – ask what qualities of that person you can embrace.
Perhaps it is Robin’s compassion, his humor, his creativity, or his spontaneity. Choose the quality you most admire and now ask: How can I bring that into my life more each day in honor of him and to make the world a better place? This, I believe, is how people live on…through us…and how we begin to heal our loss.
Robin Williams was an enormously gifted actor and comedian and I am so sad about his death.
When one hears suicide there is the additional pain on top of the loss. For me it was, “Oh, he must have been so sad and depressed and those who loved him might have known he was suffering but couldn’t help no matter what they said or did. No matter how much love they gave to him.”
Our minds are an organ and we can’t forget that over time they can become worn out, stressed out, exhausted and it can take just one moment where one feels like one cannot cope another day.
I’m a grief specialist by profession and personal experience. I run a group for bereaved mothers (there are 29 of us). Our group has been together for 5 and 1/2 years. In it are several mothers whose children have also died of suicide. It’s a terrible and painful loss. Many of these children were in treatment and, yes, medication and therapy do help, of course, but sometimes no matter what others do the person who suffers cannot get out of that dark and torturous place.
So what does one do when a friend (like Robin Williams) take himself away from this world? We grieve, that is what we do. We cry some, we pray for their family members left behind, and we remember to show compassion to everyone for we really don’t know what someone is going through.
Lastly, we whisper a tender prayer of thanks to his soul for sharing such wonderful talents with us. His soul which made us laugh, slap our knee and shake our heads in wonder for the sweet man with the twinkling blue eyes that will never forget.
Mary Jane, what a wonderful resource you provide through your grief support group. Grieving, not judging, is a healthy way to work through loss. I agree that we cannot know what another person’s experience is like and, therefore, are never in a position to judge. We can, however, do as your group is doing – connect and show compassion for ourselves and others. Bless you for the difference you are making to those you serve.