It’s one of those rare overcast days in Colorado and I’m working in my home office with nice music playing. I’ve been thinking about Valentine’s Day, realizing it will be here soon. On my walk today, I was remembering when I was a little girl and how I loved every single Valentine I received and truly believed each message was written
just for me.
As an elementary teacher, I saw young faces light up and smiles appear as each child would pore over every word of each valentine. They were probably thinking just what I used to think. “This was written just for Me!”
It wasn’t until I married my husband that I once again had that totally special feeling on Valentine’s Day. He was the prince of card selectors and I could hardly wait to open what he had chosen. He wasn’t a wordy kind of guy in person, and yet he always found THE Valentine with the perfect words…words that made me feel like his princess. I truly felt that each word was written just for me.
Two Valentine Days have gone by since he passed away and now here comes the third! I don’t want to set myself up for sadness or for feeling sorry for myself, and yet I can’t help but wish that I could once more open one of his special February 14th treasures.
Knowing that isn’t going to happen, I’ve given myself another little gift and I pretend it’s from him.
He would often turn up a sweet love song that was playing on the radio
and I knew he was telling me it was just for Me. I have a song that touches my heart and if he were here, I think it would touch his, too. It comes from the Eat, Pray, Love soundtrack: Neil Young’s “Harvest Moon”.
I’m not waiting until Valentine’s Day to play it. In fact, it’s playing as I’m writing and even though it brings tears to hear it, it also carries the reminder of how much love we shared together. Knowing that
nothing lasts forever, I’m just so grateful to have had the years of love that we had.
I can hear him saying, “Happy Valentine’s Day, Honey.” As I listen to the song, I’m pretending he’s turning up the radio and, with that, I’m telling myself, “I think this was written Just for Me”!!
Sharon Greenlee 2011
Tags: belongings, Depression, funerals, money, signs and connections
I lost my husband almost 2 years ago. He was a good card selector, too – and his handwriting seems to have love in it when I read them, now. Also, I have text messages he wrote in the last 10 days of his life – there were 3 weeks of them, but I didn’t think of it in time to save all of them. He was on a long business trip when he was killed in a car accident the day before he was to arrive back home. I treasure those texts, and he said “I love you” in every one.
WORDS can be so tender and comforting, can’t they? I know whatever you have saved will remain a treasure. I’m so sorry for your tragic and sudden loss. Thank you for being in touch!