I’ve been listening and reading about the senseless shootings in Arizona. Such a tragedy. I think about all the families and friends affected by this terrible act. I think about the journey they are just beginning. Unfortunately I can relate to what they are going through.
When my sister was brutally murdered in her home, the shock alone was overwhelming. That was followed by complete sadness and anger. The one question the survivors of Tuscon will ask and will never get a justifiable answer is, “Why?”
In time, they will get the answers to all the other questions, but the why will linger on with them for the rest of their lives.
For a very long time, those affected will wake up every morning thinking about what happened. They will go to sleep every night thinking about what happened. It will become a part of who they are. I only hope they too will seek help from professionals and others who have suffered the same tragedy.
The mourners and wounded may begin — as I did — to look at the world and the people in it as bad, terrible, frightening. It will take time for them to be able to see that there is good in this world.
Personally, after 18 months, I still struggle with that issue. Most likely, they will increase their awareness of personal safety. It’s almost that “looking over your shoulder” feeling. They will avoid confrontation because they now know bad things happen to good people. In this world we live in, confronting someone about anything may result in violent actions against you.
Today, I wish I was in Tucson, close to those people, lending a shoulder to cry on, listening to their questions, comforting them. Today, I will struggle too. The memories of my sister’s murder will follow close behind me today, lingering, waiting to pop into my mind. And I too will relive those first weeks, hoping once again to wake up from this terrible nightmare.
Shirley Wiles-Dickinson 2011
Tags: Depression, guilt, signs and connections
My heart went out to the dad of the little 9 yr. girl when he gave an interview to N.B.C. on the Today Show. I could tell that he was in complete shock. He mentioned how the sibling- an 11yr. old brother will miss his sister so much since they were inseparable. I’m so thankyou that he acknowleged the impact of this tragic loss affects the entire family.
I also am thrown back into terrible sadness from listening to all the reports of the gunshot wounds. The interviewer was asking the Dad how he found out, exactly where his daughter was hit. Was she still alive when she got to the hospital, were they able to see her after she died.? I was aghast at the questions, especially just 48 hrs later when the dad was obviously in tremendous shock. Also the talk of brain injury. My 24 yr. old son died by suicide by gunshot and was not found for three days. I never saw him again to say goodbye. The media amazes me for their insensitivity to surviving families.