Young People Grieving Over Multiple Losses

A “new normal” has invaded old paradigms and left kids missing a past world, uncertain of the present, and anxious of what tomorrow will bring. More than ever, adults must become role models, listen to their children’s pleas, understand the forces behind their behaviors, and care for their tender hearts yearning to be heard and respected.

Perhaps the new normal is just an open door into the transformation of antiquated ways of being that have outgrown themselves

The issues and grief techniques found in the previous edition of my book, Life and Loss, are both timely and timeless. They inspire young people towards expression of any childhood loss in a non-judgmental oasis of safety as they travel the path from grief to healing, whether it be the loss of a toy or death from the virus.

Young People Grieving Over New Losses

Current issues such as climate change, coronavirus, and social injustice demand immediate attention and exploration in order to conquer newfound challenges by using information so universally needed to reduce stress and anxiety. Kids have learned flexibility and accommodation during the pandemic. With maturity for their health and others, they diligently social distance, wash hands, wear masks, and sneeze into their elbows. Many have mastered perseverance, communication, and action for climate change, kindness, and compassion for others by speaking out against racial injustice, providing services for others, and demonstrating activities for a healthier planet.

Yet the majority of our youth ponder questions about the authenticity and security of older generations they no longer are willing to accept as caretakers. They ask their elders, “Why can’t you move forward with the immediacy of challenges surrounding climate change?”

“Why can’t you eradicate the polarization and factions ripping apart the fabric of society?”

“Why can’t you stop the racial injustice and live in an inclusive society?”

These questions without answers exist parallel to the attributes of resilience our youth are acquiring, attributes born and grown during turbulent times. Our children can only become stronger and more capable human beings with the support, understanding, guidance, and action from the adult world.

Their voices matter, their concerns are real, and their activism is inspiring.

Excerpted from Linda Goldman’s book, Life and Loss: A Guide to Help Grieving Children Classic Edition, Routledge, 2022

Hear more from Linda on Open to Hope: Children Grieve Differently Than Adults – Open to Hope

Linda Goldman

Linda Goldman has a Fellow in Thanatology: Death, Dying, and Bereavement (FT) with a Master of Science in counseling and Master's equivalency in early childhood education. Linda is a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor and a National Certified Counselor. She worked as a teacher and counselor in the school system for almost 20 years. Currently, she has a private grief therapy practice in Chevy Chase, Maryland. She works with children, teenagers, families with prenatal loss and grieving adults. Linda shares workshops, courses and trainings on children's grief and trauma and teaches as adjunct faculty in the Graduate Program of Counseling at Johns Hopkins University and King’s University College in Ontario, Canada. She has also taught on the faculty at the University of Maryland School of Social Work/Advanced Certification Program for Children and Adolescents and lectured at many other universities including Pennsylvania State University, Buffalo School of Social Work, University of North Carolina, the National Transportation Safety Board, the University of Hong Kong, and the National Changhua University of Education in Taiwan as well as numerous schools systems throughout the country. She has taught on working with LGBT youth and working with children's grief and trauma at Johns Hopkins Graduate School, the University of Maryland School of Social Work and the Child Welfare Administration. Linda is the author of “Life and Loss: A Guide to Help Grieving Children” and “Breaking the Silence: a Guide to Help Children with Complicated Grief”. Her other books include “Bart Speaks Out: An Interactive Storybook for Young Children On Suicide”, “Helping the Grieving Child in the School”, and a Chinese Edition of “Breaking the Silence: A Guide to Help Children With Complicated Grief”, the Japanese Edition of “Life and Loss: A Guide to Help Grieving Children”, and "Raising Our Children to Be Resilient: A Guide for Helping Children Cope with Trauma in Today’s World" and a children’s book “Children Also Grieve”, Chinese translation of “Children Also Grieve” and “Coming Out, Coming In: Nurturing the Well Being and Inclusion of Gay Youth in Mainstream Society”. She has also authored contributing chapters in resources including Loss of the Assumptive World (2002), Annual Death, Dying, and Bereavement (2001-2007), Family Counseling and Therapy Techniques (1998), and The School Services Sourcebook: A Guide for School-Based Professionals (2006). She has written many articles, including Healing Magazine’s “Helping the Grieving Child in the Schools” (2012), “The Bullying Epidemic, Creating Safe Havens for Gay Youth in Schools” (2006), “Parenting Gay Youth” (2008), “Talking to Kids About Suicide” (2014), “Helping Kids Cope with Grief of Losing a Pet” (2014) and “What Complicates Grief for Children: A Case Study” (2015). Some of her articles on Children's Grief and trauma have been translated into Chinese for the Suicide Prevention Program of Beijing. She appeared on the radio show Helping Gay Youth: Parents Perspective (2008) and has testified at a hearing before the MD Joint House and Senate Priorities Hearing for Marriage Equality (2007) and the MD Senate Judicial Proceedings Committee for the Religious Freedom and Civil Marriage Protection Act (2008).